Wednesday 23 December 2009

Oh flip, it's slippy...


Was hoping that the stuff we had yesterday would just melt away... no such luck.  When I finally stuck a toe, okay my crutch, onto pavement it was like an ice rink.    About five feet of ice separated me from my car...  was I going to be defeated, NO.   So grabbed hoe and began chipping away at it, chucked a couple of buckets of hot salty water over it, and that seemed to do the trick, just one dodgy piece of ice to negotiate right by driver's door. 

Tho I did regret being so keen to get the weekly shop once I arrived at Tescos, they'd gritted the entrance road, and the petrol station, but the car park was like an ice rink,  the worst place was the disabled parking space, it was diabolical.   Someone had lightly sprinkled some grit on the walkway,  and I mean 'lightly'  it was a joke.    I managed to get a space near to the store, so didn't have far to slip and slide,   the trolleys were almost all gone,   I grabbed one and headed into the store, and as I suspected it was mayhem.  I had to go to get cigs,  and unfortunately got stuck behind folk wanting to put on complicated lottery tickets, and buy scratchcards...  the customer service lot gazed over for a while, then realised that it would be a good idea if they came over and helped out.    The place was heaving,  no time for a good old browse, a case of get list out and go get stuff.   Was confronted by the usual dozy types, who think they are the only people in the store...  and abandoned trolleys,  idiots on mobile phones ringing home to ask if a few extra pounds of sprouts were needed!    It is at this juncture you feel like screaming, it is just one day,  the shops will be open again on Sunday, you do not need to shop as if Doomsday was beckoning.   You just know that most of the food in those trolleys will end  up in landfill,  my mum used to do it, buy far too much, till she wised up.    Now we shop for Xmas sensibly, well not that sensibly, a few daft things do end up in the trolley, but what I mean is we don't buy loads of festive food, cos we know it won't get eaten. 

I was more keen to make sure I got some decent wine,    and Tescos did deliver,  they had offers on the best stuff - oh happy day.   Funny how the aisles with the cleaning stuff was the place to take refuge from the madness.  But no choice, it was time to face the checkout, only ones without a queue where the self service, which I flatly refuse to use,  as they are not self service cos they always have at least two members of staff there to sort out the mistakes/problems...   so queued up.  And did what us Brits do,  started chatting  to fellow queuers...   and when it came to my turn, and checkout lady asked if I wanted her to pack for me, I said yes...   well why not.    I was grateful, she did a very good job, she had noted my crutch,   so didn't overpack the bags.   Was happy to wish her a Merry Christmas,  and escape the store, only to be stopped by two wallys discussing something right by door, so stopping everyone getting thru!     One cash machine was already out of cash,  dumb woman asked me if only one machine was working: er, yeah, that's why we're all queuing by it...  doh.     Annoying brat, who ran off with his mum's card,  thinking it was funny, she didn't, his dad hauled him off, but not far enough.  Observation:  a spoilt little brat, only kid, and totally indulged.  He was clambering all over a trolley, while his dumb father looked on....   felt sorry for the mother, she had two idiots to look after.   She should have left both at home.    Actually that is a bloody good idea, leave the kids at home with dad when shopping...    let us all enjoy some peace and quiet, you can also enjoy a sneaky quiet cup of coffee!    And as for the idiot who invented mini sized trolleys, it had to be a man,   stoopid idea, kids will just use them as missiles...  they should be banned. 

And now we are into festive TV,  all your favourites have now disappeared off the screen to be replaced by wall to wall films,   most of which you never wanted to see in the first place.    Come on, hands up, who'd be happy on xmas day with the usual TV fayre,  a few hours of This Morning, an hour of anarchy with Loose Women...   15 mins of the Queen...   all would be fine. But nope,  Scrooge has already decided what we will watch,   schedule was put together during his severe hangover,  so it is all bah humbug.

Oh well, 24 hours to go....   Santa is priming his SatNav as we speak,   and tweaking Rudolph's nose,  giving it an extra polish...  

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