Tuesday, 25 November 2008

A horrible day

I make no apologies, I am in a really black mood. I felt really positive this morning, felt sure that consultant would give me some good news, that I was now well down the road to recovery... The one thing I have learned about my consultant is that he is a cheery chappy, and so when it comes to bad news he leaves it to his flunkies.

So off I went to hospital, nice sunny day. Got nice parking spec, but that left me with a long walk to fracture clinic, guess my knee was letting me know that not all was well and that I should lower my expectations, as it was killing me. Walking got worse and worse as I hobbled along. A few weeks ago I'd have not even thought about it. Off I was sent to X-ray, met by blase radiographer, knee and wrist, she said. Wrist first. So she did that, then asked me to get on bed, and I rolled up trousers and her blaseness went away, in fact it disappeared in a puff of smoke. Blimey, you really have an it operated on, she exclaimed. Suddenly she was gentle and caring, yep, my knee has that effect on people. Back to waiting room, and waited 2 minutes, got called in. Doc was looking at xray of wrist, that was fine, I agreed, wrist is still just a tad stiff but is loosening up nicely. On to knee... and then he got serious... got asked to bend knee, fat chance pal, tho if I let it dangle it does go a bit further, we got 79 per cent, and 89 per cent for straight. I just knew from his face that summat wasn't right, that whatever was coming wasn't good news. And it wasn't, knee is stuffed. He said from looking at xray you'd have thought I'd fallen down a flight of stairs, knee was so badly broken. Wires and screws are now 'prominent' - tho he wouldn't and refused to dwell on that bit, saying that things might just settle down, if not then yes, another operation was on the cards.

I can kiss goodbye to my job... as it involves walking, bending, kneeling... all the things I can't do anymore and won't be able to do. Plus I can say goodbye to all my walks along the beach, which I love, the beach is my sanctuary, like nowt more than to go sit on a rock and watch the water.

Tho I am wondering what acupuncture may be able to do. This weekend I am going also goes into acupressure...

Sorry it is a depressing post, but it is how i feel right now. I also apologise to all the moronic drivers I swore at this morning... tho it was also their fault!


Cazzy said...

You poor thing Cass, that is awful. I hope you don't have to have another op. You have put up with it all so well.
Keep on hoping, and chin up chuck!

Cazzy xx

queenie said...

Hi cass thought i would pop on over now i,ve managed to join blogland!!!Thanks for your lovely commment you left on mine.I was sorry to read your having a tough time right now,fingers and toes crossed for you.
hugs tracy xx